While people go on discovering and designing masses of things that make their lives more comfortable and altogether brighter, love remains the precarious mystery it has always been. We have much more facilities and amenities than ever, people have more money than, say, a century ago – but nothing about love has become easier, or, at least, more understandable. Such notions as respect, trust, faith remain as unfathomable as ever.

They are also the things we crave for most and miss most when we don’t get enough. When we have these feelings for someone else, we want them reciprocated. But then it dawns on us that it is not always this way, sadly. Hearts break when our emotions have to subsist without attention from people we respect and love.

So when you see a person who you believe may be a potential friend, lover or partner, many questions arise at once: how to attract them? How to keep them? It may be easily achieved on an initial stage by acting or pretense, but you know that you won’t be able to keep the pretense up forever, and it’s bound to enrage the other person at the end – which is sure to lead to a breakup.

Of course, there are no hard-and-fast ways to ensure success in drawing the one you like to your side for good; it would be a lie to say so. Nevertheless, some advice can be given, and some stratagems can be implemented, to cut a more attractive figure and add fuel to turn sparks into a raging fire. So, if you have gotten into such a situation, see if these tips can help you!

Create a better attitude

We all know that someone who thinks positively makes a good impression on people. If you have an inclination to dwell on the darker things in life, try and shift to the sunny side, appreciate the good in your life. It’s a kind of personality that is all but guaranteed to come across as very attractive to men. Oh, and not to men only – there is nobody who wouldn’t like to have a positively minded friend, one who shows by his or her personality just how zestful life is! It emerges from studies that the habit of smiling as often as we reasonably can works for us, as well as if we quit worrying about something that we can’t change. There are so many unfair situations and dire circumstances, but we won’t change them by running on and on about how atrocious it is. It is far better to enjoy living! And not for yourself only, for your life influences other people too, so give your positive attitude by handfuls to others, and even if they won’t respond in the same vein, you will feel fulfilled.

Be yourself

Your first wish may be to go out of your way to please the one you laid your eyes on, but you would do well to halt and reconsider. While doing this, you will be overstepping the bounds of your usual personality. You show the man a changed image of yourself, but if you want him to fall in love with you, it should be the real you he will fall for, not what you make out to be. Again, after a while, the pretense will wear out, and he will see you for what you are. So, the thing is not to create disappointments for yourself by appearing larger than life. Don’t forget that you are a unique person, and therein lies your individual charm. Your own special partner will choose you for what you are, so it’s deplorable to feed him with deception, even an insignificant one. If you feel that you need to put yourself out in order to lure him on, maybe it’s not your ideal partner after all! It may be a waste of time, and no amount of pretense will bring you happiness.

Show him invariable respect

From the oldest of times the man was looked upon as the head of the family, a breadwinner, protector, and the pillar of family integrity – for which he was honored or feared, or both at the same time. Now it’s different, women have won independence, rising over their former servitude and inferior position. They are no longer confined to the kitchen-church-children circle; they can voice their opinions and make them stand. Professionally and socially they have achieved equality and can attain the same heights as men do. That’s all fine as it is, but it shouldn’t deprive men of their well-deserved respect. Even if you can easily match him in status or property, you will lose him if you start to show disrespect. Men seek security as much as women but in other regards. So, establish the situation where both of you are respectful towards one another.

Be worth his trust

Men are often afraid that women will be disloyal. You want your man to feel relaxed and secure when you are around. Any sound relationship ought to be based on integrity. Healthy interrelations and trust must go side by side. However strong other factors could be, without mutual trust, they won’t be able to make the union a lasting one. But when one knows that one’s partner is loyalty incarnate, and their decisions concerning the two of you will always be acceptable, this is going to last. One of the main requirements for trust is that your man knows you will never gossip about his weaknesses. He will never stay with you after he has discovered that all your friends know his little guilty secrets. But his love will grow as he understands that he can count on you not to tell anyone else what he confides to you about his deep fears and insecurity.

Stay confident and informed

When you come to think about it, you have no real need to feel unsure of yourself. You don’t need your man to reiterate you every day that you are beautiful to feel confident in yourself. Actually, men like it when their women are self-assured and know what they want to get from life. Those who lack this quality are doomed to pamper their self-worth asking others for compliments – and this is a certain way to attract people who will play along to these desires with a view of gaining ascendance and bend these poor women to their will. You can’t do that to a woman who is calm and collected; she is more likely to be respected by the opposite sex and her own sex alike, and that adds quite a lot to her charms. Also, keep in mind that willpower comes from reading – let books teach you things about yourself and other people, as well as about the principles of intercommunication. Invest in good books and leave mediocrity behind.

Let your femininity be always prevalent

The modern woman often finds herself among men, competing with men, adjusting herself to men. There is nothing bad about it, but as time goes by, some of the manliness around her begins to rub off on her: the way she dresses, the way she socializes, her everyday habits slowly change. Again, it is quite all right – unless in this process of fitting in they find that their femininity gets worn out. Do not allow the female side of you go under, express it in any reasonable way you can, your workplace included. You may be tempted to behave in men’s company like men do, and it has its advantages, but bear in mind that if you retain your femininity, men will appreciate it and be more attentive to you. Men like to feel woman’s emotive emanations among them. Even if they enjoy male company, they want to feel drawn to a woman, to feel woman’s specific presence around. This is what you must always manifest.

Be around when he needs you

No matter how strong your man is, there will come a time when he will feel down and on his weakest. At such moments he wants to be listened to, he needs an outlet for his sour emotions. Yours is a happy relationship if you are the woman he turns to for solace and understanding. So you have to be aware that your support and inner strength may be needed in the direst of times. You are the one who will tell him that nothing is over yet and the night is darkest before dawn. When he is coming through a difficult phase, he must know that you are his greatest comfort and his ray of hope. When he feels alone and deserted by everybody, that must exclude you. Then you will earn his never-ending love and respect and give him fond memories to cherish through his life.

Treat him as the only one

People are apt to forget what was done for them – but with feelings, it’s another story, people remember their good times and remember who they had it with. With men, good feelings often concentrate on their egos. Whatever happens, they need to feel loved, appreciated, even cosseted. They will reach for a star in the sky for a present to their beloved woman. You don’t want to put their masculinity to question and thus make them turn away from you. This is what they want to be played up for, not put down. A man will never leave a woman who lets him know that he is far more beautiful than any Hollywood actor. Moreover, he will do his best to make her happy. As soon as he knows that her love and respect for him are undying, he will remain by her side. Hint to him that he is worthless, and he will vanish into thin air.